*spoilers ahead obviously*
*I mean it. If you haven’t watched Episode 2 of Season 4, don’t even look. I cut right to the chase*
A day of joy has finally come!
One of the most hated, despicable characters in Game of Thrones is gone!
King Joffrey is dead! Banzai!!! I guess GRRM has a thing for weddings. To the point. What the f*ck writers?! Can’t say I didn’t expect that to happen eventually but… on the 2nd episode?! They way you’re are at it, by the end of the season there will be no enemies for Daenerys’ dragons to slay! (Just kidding!) Today’s episode just proves that Game Of Thrones is not a series one should EVER take lightly.
This episode is almost as exciting and surprising as the Red Wedding episode!
And I say almost because, I am sort of a conspiracy freak. Let me explain.
Some of us remember Lady Melisandre’s promise on episode 8 (“Second Sons”) of season 3.
To help refresh your memory, Melisandre had captured Gendry, and had used his royal blood to cast a curse on three men:
Rob Stark, Joffrey Baratheon and Balon Greyjoy. I am not saying that she actually caused this to happen but we have indeed seen that her God of Light is pretty effective so far; Lord Beric Dondarrion is said to have been resurrected plenty of times by Red Priest Thoros of Myr and let’s not forget about the creepy shadow-baby Melisandre gave birth to, that killed Renly.
Taking all that into consideration, Joffrey’s death might not be an accident and I’ve got to be honest, I expect Balon to go down soon.
Be it the sociopathic Ramsey Snow who kills him or just some supernatural force, I have a feeling he’s already signed his death warrant. No matter what, you have got to say, that Red Lady is one lucky b*tch.
Now, as to the murderer of Joffrey. We have to think, who would pull off something like that?
Because Tyrion is way too smart for something as dumb as that. On the other hand, framing Tyrion IS smart. We’re talking evil Rain Man smart, as no one could have predicted that Tyrion would end up serving Joffrey wine.
But it’s not only about who has the brains or cojones to poison Joffrey, it’s also about whose hate and lust for vengeance was great enough?
The obvious choice for the culprit is Sansa. She had every reason in the world and was fortunate enough to get the timing right.
She picks up the cup for Tyrion, could have easily put some kind of poison inside. However that’s dumb on her behalf because Tyrion is awesome and now, 100% utterly f*cked. So, was it Sansa?
Nope! Before the whole “let’s make uncle feel like a fool to prove our manliness”, Lady Olenna of House Tyrell approaches Sansa and very discretely touches her necklace (the one Ser Dontos gave her as a “thank you” for saving his life).
Next thing we know a piece of her jewelry is missing. And don’t forget Olenna’s line “…killing a man at a wedding. Horrid. What kind of monster would do something like that?”
Also, we should keep in mind that the bottle of wine was right in front of Grandma.
Ok. And why would House Tyrell benefit from the death of Joffrey? That’s simple.
Margaery is already loved by the people. She makes an even better Queen without Joffrey around.
Grandma Tyrell, probably guilty.
Now dear writers… why did Joffrey have to die so soon? Is this season going to be full of blood and twists? I guess there are a lot of happy fans out there.
I can almost see Arya Stark making a happy sword-dance and Stannis burning a few of his best friends just to celebrate this lovely turn of events! But some are pissed off, saying that things are moving too fast. Well, I am with the happy folks.
King Joffrey was a sick son of a bitch.
(And I mean that literally, I now officially hate Cersei. Don’t know why. No reason.)
As far as this episode is concerned, I think we should not forget Bran’s awesomeness gradually unfolding.
He s going to be a badass. I’m sure.
Cersie is jelous of Brienne, Jamie jealous of Ser Loras and Loras is probably having a threesome with Oberyn and his Sand girl.
I am already in love with Prince Oberyn, the way he spoke to the former Queen Regent, priceless!
He might just pay his debt to the Lannisters after all.
To sum up. Despite the fact that I am still in a bit of a shock, the smile I got on my face when I saw Joffrey taking his last breath hasn’t faded!
(Sorry Jack Gleeson, this just proves you are an AWESOME actor! And I will miss you.)
Anyway. Now that Joffrey’s gone, WHAT THE HELL IS NEXT?!
One thing’s for sure, Game of Thrones season 4 is going to be sick!
Till next Sunday, don’t forget. Valar Morghulis.
terebinosekai 